about 12 botox injection, 2 facelifts, & 6 collagen injections away from becoming Jocelyn Wildenstein Beta

Peddistache: the preffered moustache of Pedophiles. (note: this man is not a pedophile, he just looks like one)

Narcissus, mesmerized by the exquisitely chiseled contours of his own jaw, sat transfixed for days, gazing upon his live webcam-captured visage as reflected by the computer screen, waving to himself in jubilant celebration of his sublime comeliness. And so he starved to death.

This is me, and this is my cranially-conjoined parasitic twin.

Photoshop: the number one fail-safe weight loss system. Your avatar could lose up to 60 pixel pounds in 60 seconds!

I <3 CGI Unitard.

Entrepaneur, marketter, publisher, John Goodman in the Great Outdoors impersonator…

Must. Suck. In. Harder. OHGOD… I JUST SUCKED MY NECK INTO MY THORACIC CAVITY…

“This is how you hold a bag of sand”: School 4 Mimes

Our brand is “Butterface.”

Headshot submitted to “War of Northern Aggression” Re-enactment.

Everyday Depression.